WWE WWW Review Archive (December 2015-July 2017)

The Hardcore Files #15 (13-Man Battle Royal)

On this special fifteenth edition of The Hardcore Files, we have a unusual match, taking place on the grandest stage. That’s right, we’re back at WrestleMania for WrestleMania 2000. This match though is no one on one contest, it’s not a triple threat, it’s not even a fatal four way. This match is a Battle Royal for the Hardcore Title, and with the 24/7 Rule intact, things could get interesting. So, let’s get into it.

Date: April 2, 2000

Where: WrestleMania 2000

Watch: WWE Network

(Hardcore Championship) 13-Man Battle Royal

This match consists of Crash Holly, Tazz, Viscera, The Mean Street Posse, KAIENTAI, Hardcore Holly, the Head Bangers, and the APA.

This match is a little different than a usual battle royal. The only way to win is by pin, and the match has a 15 minute time limit. Once the time limit stops, the match is done. In those 15 minutes, the title can change hands as many times as possible as long as the clock is still ticking.

Once the match began, everyone scattered, brawling all around ringside and left Crash Holly in the ring with Tazz. Less than 30 seconds into the match, Tazz hit a suplex on Crash and pinned him to become the new Hardcore Champion. Tazz immediately jumped out of the ring and joined the crowd of guys fighting and hitting each other with every weapon the could find. Because you have to pin the champion for the title to change hands, Viscera targeted Tazz and slammed him on the floor, before pinning him, becoming the new Hardcore Champion. This happening all in one minute. Now, then fun begins, because which one of these 13 men can take down Viscera?

Every man was for themselves as all kinda of things were being tossed around. Cooling fans, road signs, cookie sheets, flags, 2×4’s, trash cans, telephones, and anything else you could think of was being used as a weapon. But, after nearly a 5 minute reign as champion, the APA took Viscera down with a 2×4 and a top rope shoulder block. But, instead of pinning him, they let Funaki get the win, so then they could have a easier opponent to beat. Funaki was the new Hardcore Champion. He then ran backstage with everyone following him, and he was then quickly beaten by Mean Street Posse’s Rodney, who was then beaten twenty four seconds later by his partner, Joey Abs.

Joey was Hardcore Champion for about the same amount of time as Rodney, before getting attacked and pinned by Thrasher from the Head Bangers. The crowd of brawling wrestlers made their way back towards the ring, but it was a bloody Pete Gas who took down Thrasher with a fire extinguisher, and pinned him on the ramp to become the new Hardcore Champion. Pete Gas’ reign as champion lasted longer than his other Mean Street Posse brothers, but only by a minute because soon after his win, he was taken down to ringside and suplexed on the floor and pinned by Taz, who is now a two time champion in this match, with just over four minutes left.

Taz battled the Holly cousins in the ring while a bloody, brutal, brawl continued to happen on the outside. With less than a minute left, Tazz was still the champion but after getting nailed by a trash can lid, Tazz lost his Hardcore title to Crash Holly with 36 seconds left on the clock. Tazz immediately locked in his Tazzmission choke hold. Crash Holly scrambled to hold on for 30 more seconds, but after Hardcore Holly smashed some sort of glass vase over both of their heads, Hardcore Holly pinned Crash and won with one second left. It looked like Crash got his shoulder up, and even he thought he won, but the ref said his pin counted and we have a new Hardcore Champion; Hardcore Holly.

That was something. Something very, very entertaining. I wouldn’t complain if we had a match like this every once in a while because it was so much fun. Just carnage and chaos everywhere and the title changed hands a total of 10 times in 15 minutes. But, with the Hardcore 24/7 Rule, who knows how long Hardcore Holly will be the champion. Tune in tomorrow to see what other crazy, adventurous, and hardcore matches will be on The Hardcore Files.


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