Editorials WWE

Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar from WrestleMania 33 and The “Epic Needs to be Long” Standard

Suplex. Suplex. Suplex. Spear out of nowhere. Another spear. Brock fell out of the ring. He was then speared through the barricade. The world came tumbling down on ‘The Beast Incarnate’ yet again with Heyman screaming for him. Goldberg was boo’d merely a minute ago and as soon as he hoisted Brock for the jackhammer he was a hero. I bit on it. Even though I knew Brock had to have been winning, there was a feeling of disbelief in what was happening. Jackhammer. 1-2-kickout. The crowd erupts. Brock then leaps over the spear in one of the most shocking spots I’ve ever witnessed live. I thought it was over. We get to the grand total of 10 suplexes. An F5 was hit. 1-2-3. Lesnar is yet again the beast.

It’s something out of a stupid dream that I’ve come to love a match between these two so much. Goldberg, a faulty title reign; a feud exemplifying all that’s wrong about making new stars. Except it caught me in every match. It caught me when they interacted. The first match was brilliant, it made me angry. The Rumble made me question why even bother with this. I was rolling my eyes at the fact this would be a squash. Yet it was worked like a 30 minute epic, compact into 4 minutes, and might just be one of my favorite matches ever, and one of the best, if not, THE BEST WrestleMania match of all time to me.

And they say, a lot of the time, that epic needs to be long.

I got into a debate in our Slack chat tonight about this. When a bell rings, a match is underway. I gauge matches on how they were worked like anyone else. How they made me feel, especially in the moment, with hindsight attached. How the characters got over. What continuity existed. The presentation, and so on. Looking back at how I felt in the moment, and how I felt after rewatching remained the same. I’ve never been so convinced I’ve seen a perfect match through my eyes. I bit on the near falls. I was blown away by the quickness of everything happening. It was literally the ultimate thrill ride, and that’s no forced catch phrase. For 4 minutes and some spare change, I was taken on one of my favorite wrestling trips of all time. It has everything I love in a wrestling match. It’s why I now ask more than ever:

Why penalize a match if it does what an “epically” paced match does in its long period, in this case, better than the majority of matches I’ve ever seen.

Because I sure don’t. The replay value is through the roof. I can continue to watch and be blown away. To think that I was ready to shit all over this, and now it’s one of my favorite matches of all time in WWE.

Five stars. Epic substance isn’t just contained in long matches. It can be just as short as 4 minutes, and more impactful than almost every match I’ve ever seen. Pro wrestling is art, and of course, all art is subjective to the eye of the opinion’s beholder. But I’ll be damned if I don’t want to sing this match’s praises, continuing to be a proponent of the fact that not every five star match, or out of this world match, or however you see matches after the fact, HAVE to be traditionally long. Case in point through all of this: Wrestling is the best.

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